Babywise Update: How's It Going (Week 8)

Hey there folks. I want to be sure to update my blog as often as possible. I have so many things to share, mommiehood, being a military wife, and what's going on with Mariah. I'll also try to dedicate a few posts to Babywise, the parent directed feeding method Michael and I are using. Mariah has started her OWN blog to keep you all updated on what she's up to. Be sure to sign up to FOLLOW her blog.

Babywise weeks 7-9 is the time period all mommies secretly can't wait to get to. Why? Because that's when the middle of the night feeding should drop off. If following the Feed --> Wake --> Sleep routine on a 2 1/2 - 3 hr schedule prior to week 7, baby should sleep at least 7 to 8 hours through the night by week 9. I'm happy to say we've hit that mark! How did we get here? Now that's what makes this an entertaining post! It's been constant flexibility and persistence on our part. We've had to work very hard at feeding her on schedule, keeping her awake directly after eating, and putting her down for a nap after her wake time. Through these couple months, we've made several mistakes. We had some really good days right on schedule and some rough days. The key, however, to recovering from an "off-day" is to get back on schedule. This may take a couple of feedings, but aim to get back on your regular routine. Staying on routine not only trains your lactation and metabolism, but it also keeps baby's stomach in check! Baby's tummy begins to become hungry and expect food at your scheduled times. This allows baby to eat a FULL MEAL and not snack feed. This also ensures mom is secure in knowing what baby wants and needs throughout the day. If it's Noon and she eats at Noon, then she's crying because she's hungry. If it's 1 p.m. and she just ate, then you know she needs a nap. If it's in the middle of a nap after a full feeding, then you know it's a dirty diaper or trapped gas. (This isn't perfect by any means. There are times when you just can't figure it out.)

Weeks 5 -8 in particular have taught us several things. Here are our highlights-

Mistakes We Made

1) Calculating wake time:
I realized very recently that we'd been calculating waketime all wrong. For those not familiar with the Babywise method, waketime is the amount of time the baby is awake...between naps. I thought it meant the time AFTER a feeding. But, no! It is the time awake, including feedings. For example, on a 6a, 9a, 12p, 3p, 6p, 9p, 11p schedule. Wake time would be from 6am when the feeding starts, until the child goes to sleep. Wake time should be 40 to 70 minutes with babies between the age of 6-8 weeks according to Chronicles of Babywise Mom. I have found this time frame to work well for Mariah as well.

2) Feeding dropped, so pump less often:
When Mariah dropped her middle of the night feeding around 6 weeks, I stopped pumping in the middle of the night. My breasts assumed I did not need that milk and so they began to fill less. Now, I wake up in the middle of the night to check on her and I notice my breasts are not consistently firm. I realize now that I need to continue to pump throughout the day, perhaps an additional time so that my breasts still "think" I need that milk. I have noticed a decrease in my supply. Remember, breast milk typically works on supply and demand, so keep demanding and pray they keep supplying. Don't stop demanding.

3) Middle of the night cry isn't always hunger:
This was a huge "AHA!" moment for me last week. The first time Mariah slept through the night was around 6 weeks. She did it twice in a row. I was prepared for this to not be permanent since Babywise says it happens after week 7. However, I knew she was making progress in the right direction. Well, after night two of consistent sleep, she woke up during night 3. I heard the cry and immediately looked at the clock. It was 4 a.m. So strange. Oh well! I took her into my embrace and nursed her. She was out in 10 minutes. That was really odd! She never eats for such a short amount of time. Then I realized that was a snack! Oh no...not snack feedings. Hmmm. The next day I was baffled because yet again she fussed at 4 a.m. By day 3 of this, I began doing research to figure out what was going on. Then it hit me! I recall the Babywise book explaining that different cries warrant different responses. It dawned on me that I didn't stop to see if she needed anything else, I just offered food. That night she woke at 330am, I offered the pacifier and she went right back to sleep until 730am.

Lessons We Learned

*The importance of optimal nap time:
I had no idea what this was until a few days ago. Optimal nap time is the best time to put your little one down for a nap to get optimal (i.e. very little) pre-sleep fussiness. Putting them down at this time also discourages waking up early from naps. [ [ [What do I mean by waking up early? According to Babywise, a 5 - 8 week baby that is sleeping through the night should nap continuously for 1 1/2 to 2 hrs 5 to 6 times per day.] ] ] The key is to figuring out when your baby's optimal nap time is to look for sleep cues: yawning, red around the eyes, slight fussiness, loosing alertness. Optimal nap time will vary from child to child. It may even vary at different parts of the day. Mariah, for example is ready to go down in 40 minutes earlier in the day and 60 minutes later in the day.

Keep in mind you want to be ahead of the curve in figuring out that this time is coming so that you can PUT BABY DOWN AWAKE. That is key in teaching baby how to fall asleep on her own. The optimal time window also passes within about 15 minutes. I've noticed with Mariah that if I miss her optimal window, she'll lay down, obviously exhausted, and refuse to sleep. Instead she'll lay there and look around, sometimes until her next feeding!

*Handling the 45-minute intruder:
Babywise speaks of the elusive 45-minute intruder! What makes it so elusive is that it can easily be confused with a variety of other issues such as, decrease in milk supply, growth spurts, or overstimulation. The sign of the 45-minute intruder is when baby is sleeping on schedule fairly consistently then all of a sudden wakes 45 minutes early...in other words, 45 minutes before the next feed time. Babywise suggests treating this like a hunger issue before assuming it's a sleep issue. So, if baby wakes early, feed and adjust their schedule. If they do not take a full-feeding then you know its not a feeding issue and you can treat it like a sleep issue. A common suggestion if its a sleep issue is reducing the amount of wake time as it may be overstimulating your little one. Other suggestions can be found here. Mariah has hit her 45-minute intruder this week. Both yesterday and today have experienced this unwelcome visitor! It is definitely and odd situation. Parents that are schedulers, like myself, may find it really hard to deal with. You're accustomed to knowing exactly when your child will do what then all of a sudden something out of the norm happens and you're left scratching your head. The 45-minute intruder appears during weeks 7 or 8 and again around 4 months (or 16 weeks). Recognize it and tackle it. It should be gone in a couple days. Leave it untreated and it could affect milk supply and throw your routine out of whack for a long time. I'll be sure to let you know when ours disappears.

*Sleep begets sleep:
Babies need adequate rest during the day to sleep well at night. Counter to what seems would make sense, Babywise and non-Babywise researchers have found that babies that sleep well during the day are more likely to sleep through the night. Sleeping well is defined by getting the recommended 16-18 hrs per day (includes nighttime rest). Sleeping well also means that baby can comfortably transition from active to deep sleep and back again. Each phase lasts about 40-50 minutes. Mariah goes through about 1 cycle per nap: active --> deep --> active.

Well that was a boat load of information. My goal is to not only share my experiences with it, but also provide detailed information for any of you considering using the method. It takes a lot of encouragement in the beginning. I hope to provide that to those of you that are starting out on the Babywise path. :)

Toodles!

More Babywise info can be found here.